THREE THINGS

There are 2 things you must do
Pat Parker said
in a poem,
which lives with me today
White people, if you want to be my friend,
there are two things you must do.
First, you must forget that I am black.
Second, you must never forget that I am black.
It is that dance between
remembering and forgetting
which opens us up to
knowing people for who they are
in a way we are not
always mindful of.
So who ever you are
if you really want to be my friend
you have to forget all the things
you think you know about me
you have to stop dressing me
in the stories, stereotypes, and discourse
about the identities you dress me in.
At the same time
don’t forget any of those identities
because they have shaped my life
and continue to do so
whether I want them to or not.
While all of that is who I appear to be
I am more than any of that
and the me that is rarely seen
is the one who I am
when I am alone with
my private dancer.
That dance is where
I grow and evolve,
allowing myself to
become one with the one
who knows my soul
and teaches me how
to radiate love
to all as I teach them
to dance with me.
So if you want to be my friend
really be my friend,
there are three things you must do.
First, forget all the identities you dress me in.
Second, never forget those identities you dress me in.
Finally, remember that like a dance,
I am never the same person twice.