BLAME

It is so easy
to point the finger at others
and blame them
for the condition
of my life, however
it is not their fault.

When I blame others,
it means I am giving away
my power,
my honesty,
my integrity
and my spiritual wealth.

it means I am giving away
the opportunities for me to grow,
to evolve,
to transform
and to take responsibility
for my own life

I may not be able to change
the legacy I inherited,
however, I can create the life
I choose to live.
I begin by taking responsibility
and not blaming others

What I have done
or not done in my life
is about me
not you.
What you have done
in your life is about you.
How I respond to it
and what I do with it is about me

if I do not like my life
then I cannot blame you.
I have to accept
responsibility
and then be responsible
for doing what I can
to transform my dreams
and my realities

So when I hear myself blaming others
I need to stop and
focus on my own life
and begin to be the change
I want to see in my life
and in my world.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

Celebrate your life and live it to its fullest

AND THE LITTLE BOY SAID

We all go through rough times in life. It is easy to want to blame others for our situation, but it is not about others, but ourselves. I keep learning and relearning that when I blame others, it just keeps the sadness and negativity in control of my life. The longer I hold on to my negativity and sadness, the more of my joy and wealth I give away. Sometimes we just need someone to help us refocus.

Decades ago, I worked in a summer camp and had a little boy named Mikey. He was learning how to be away from his mom for the first time in his life. He would come in crying and I began playing this game with him to redirect his energy. I would say can you make a monster face and he would. How about a sad face and he would and before you knew it he was okay and then we could go play with the other kids.

One day we were playing the water when I realized I had lost a piece of jewelry that I never took off. It brought tears to my face and no matter how hard I tried I could not stop the tears from rolling down my face, and then this little boy gave me a gift I will never forget. I tried to capture this in a poem about us and this experience.

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ON THE DAY I WAS BORN.

Dear God,

As I finished reading Doreen Virtue’s book, Assertiveness for Earth Angels, I found myself thinking back to the day I was born. It was, as you know, not an easy time for my birth mother or me as we both almost died in childbirth. For the longest time I blamed myself at some level for the challenges she went through. At the same time, I missed the experience of feeling welcomed into the world and spent a good bit of time in my life feeling as if I just was not good enough. It was as if I blamed myself for not being Jewish enough for my birth mother and her family to keep me, not being black enough for my birth family and his father to take me. Then when I was finally adopted, I battled to feel Jacobson enough next to my brothers who were biologically my parent’s children. I remember my brother once telling me I was not a real Jacobson. I have had to work at releasing those feelings and realize that the near death experience I had as an infant was a central and key part of my life and of who I am today.

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